Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Because we ALWAYS have something to smile about

Welp, I've hit a slump a little bit. Everything here continues to amaze me, but I have been feeling a little stressed out lately. I spent dinner two nights ago listening to my host-brother talk about how I cut wrong, while my host-sister was kicking me under the table the whole time. I know how insignificant that sounds, but that is the closest I have come to snapping at the little tots. (Just compunding onto my mood made it awful!) And then yesterday we were playing soccer in the hallway and Natalia started being a brat and just wouldn't stop screaming at me. (She got really mad and just kept yelling "Tonta!!" which is like an equivalent to "idiot") so I just walked into my room and closed the door and told her I was done playing with them for the day. They didn't like that too much, but I was done listening to that... So I'm just feeling a little bit overwhelmed, and have just spent a lot of time over the past few days doing some personal reflection, and it's just been a long week. But having said that, I'm trying my very best just to stay optimistic, and I'm really grateful that there has yet to come a day where I haven't just about died laughing at some point. I know how blessed I am, and I love that even when things don't feel right I still can recognize how lucky I am and be filled with the joy of knowing that.

On the night after the kids were being obnoxious I just went back to my room and pulled out the lovely envelope of letters that one of my best friends sent with me to Spain, and pulled one of them out, and I would like to share what it said, because I was moved to tears in the most wonderful way, and I hope that this can touch you all the same way it touched me: (this is taken from a sermon that my friend heard)

"Agape. That's the New Testament word for love that I'm talking about- the kind of love that we're all longing for and nothing else even comes close. This is the kind of love that when demonstrated properly changes everything. It's an active and unconditional love. It's the kind of love that says, 'I'll never think of myself first; everything I do is for someone else'. It's the kind of love that says, 'I'll be rejected so you can be accepted; I'll be humiliated so you can be lifted up'. It's the kind of love that says, 'I'll sit this one out for the good of the team; I'll move to the back so my friend can move up front'. It's a rare kind of love that proves its merit by action, the kind that wakes up every morning and asks, 'how can I serve everyone around me today?' It's the kind of love that when there are 3 tickets to a U2 concert and 4 people want to go, says, 'I'll catch them the next time they're in town'. It's a motivational love that says, 'don't worry because I got your back; you can do all things with me on your side'. It's the kind of love that says, 'I'm with you always; I'll provide for you; I'll sit with you by still waters; I'll go before you in battle'. It whispers, 'I forgive you' and shouts, 'I'm your best friend!' It leads you to truth; it steers you from harm- it's a kind of love that won't leave you, that won't forsake you, that won't misjudge you, that can't be earned, that can't be bought. It's a rare kind of love that will tackle you to the ground so you won't fall off a cliff. This is the kind of love that is better than life, stronger than death; it's patient, kind- it always protects, trusts, hopes and perseveres. Agape love is unmerited, it's unmoveable, it's unshakeable, undeniable, indestructible, secure, sensitive and straightforward. It's the kind of love that builds up, it seeks the lost, it befriends the enemies, it corrects, it guides, it comforts, it reassures. In the simplest of terms and maybe the most complete defenition, it's the kind of love that says, 'I'll die, so that you can live' ".

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